Building on yesterday’s post and the description given to us about assertiveness by Dr. Jonice Webb, we can break down the two individual parts to the definition: “Assertiveness is: Speaking up for yourself — in a way that the other person can hear.”
(As a note: although this definition of assertiveness was pulled from the article I cited in yesterday’s blog post, the rest of this post is my writing only.)
The first part of that statement refers to the process of finding our voice. When we speak up for our self, we begin by being able to recognize what our needs are. Sometimes that means slowing down before we say yes, before we allow ourselves to react, before we make a decision. It means that we begin by processing our feelings – knowing if we have enough energy to agree to something, thinking about how someone else’s behaviour or choice affected us or made us feel, what our opinion might be about something.
Very often, our habits become our reactions. Immediately saying yes to a request, or saying “It doesn’t matter,” – when it does. The first step in being able to have a voice is to first recognize what our needs are. From there, we can not only work up the courage to state our needs, we can do so in a way that allows us to be heard.
To visit Dr. Jonice Webb’s website: https://drjonicewebb.com/