My very good friend and colleague published an article entitled “Relationship, Room and Rest for the Cooped-Up Adolescent.” Written by Darlene Denis-Friske and her son Jacksen Friske, and featured through the Neufeld Institute, it gives us a bird’s eye view into what many teenagers are facing during this pandemic:
“Adolescents are absorbing intense stress during an already heightened time of developmental turbulence. For many, being cut off from school, friendships, and regular activities will fester worry about the “what ifs” that are further fuelled by negative social media exposure.”
As parents, we may be carrying the weight of trying to keep our families on track, both emotionally and financially, yet we must also consider the effect of being socially isolated is having on our children. When the build up comes bubbling out (and it most certainly will!), Darlene reminds us about the importance of resisting our own rising emotions in that moment, and leaning into their process:
“It helps to know that, in the bigger picture, this manner of expression is important and serves a purpose. We need to give it some
R-O-O-M. This is “coping in action.” This is “alarm in motion.” We do not want these emotions to get stuck inside of our adolescent with no outlet for release. What is happening in their world is terribly alarming and not easy to talk about. We are going to see them “behave how they feel” at times.”
Coping in action; what a lovely way to describe what often happens to our children when they are trying to sort out their feelings. Our reaction can help them along in processing their own journey of emotions; in letting the calm settle back in.
This article is well worth your time, with words that transcend and resonate: https://neufeldinstitute.org/relationship-room-and-rest-for-the-cooped-up-adolescent/
Thanks for letting me share, Darlene 🙂
Like this post? Consider subscribing!
Photo credit: http://Photo by Isaac Holmgren on Unsplash
What a wonderful article indeed, and there may not be an age limit for “acting how we feel”, this 62 year old admits!
Haha, I felt the same way, Gurlie 🙂 Thanks for the comment!
Great article and good reminder to be patient with my lovely teenagers!
Thanks for the comment, Lynn! Patience is the name of the game 🙂
this a really good post. kids/adolescents have all this cooped up energy with nowhere to release it. impressive darlene and kristine
Thanks Brian! It was a great article for sure; providing some reassurance to parents as well.