When we are fully ourselves in relationship, we have an innate sense of comfort within in. This is not to be mistaken for something that feels familiar – with familiarity the relationship feels safe, whereas with comfort, it feels trustworthy.
It is only when we have trust and mutual respect can we feel true comfort in relationship. Our opinions and feelings matter as do those of our loved ones.
One of the ways that we can contribute to that process is to create an environment of trust. This can include:
- Looking for ways to collaborate. We spend too much time in relationship wanting to be right. If we can shift our mindset to being open to compromise, we are able to each move in a direction that strengthens the relationship.
- Being curious. The opinions of our loved ones matter – when it comes to making family decisions, let everyone weigh in. The same goes for feelings – make space for them.
- Showing up. When we act in a trustworthy manner, we create an environment in which our loved ones feel safe and secure. Consistency is key.
Feeling accepted in relationship is one of the ways that we also feel secure in ourselves. Part of the way we can achieve that is to choose people who value relationship; the other part requires our attention as we make it our goal to create an environment of trust, for our partners, children, and loved ones.