Potential Versus Reality in the Dating World

Being single isn’t always easy. We can lean into it when we need to, learn to be content on our own, and create a satisfying life for ourselves by building our time and experiences with meaning.

We are; however, a relationship species and we tend to appreciate the attachment that comes with a long term relationship – and so we navigate the dating world. We need to use our confidence (“I know what I bring to the table and will expect no less”), and our instincts (“Goes days without answering a text – that is a red flag”) when moving through the weeds to find the flower.

An important point to consider is the following question:

“Am I dating this person for their potential or for their reality?” 

We often give people the benefit of the doubt – to our detriment – as we tell ourselves that his/her lack of ambition is due to their circumstances, or that their lack of commitment will change with time as they recognize our value.

We are much better served to lean into the reality of the relationship, into the reality of investment, into the reality of the red flags and act accordingly – moving onwards and upwards until we find a relationship where healthy, grounded and whole is the reality and not what we wish it to be.

Photo credit: https://unsplash.com/@picsbyjameslee

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