Self-Reflection Question 14

This question is for all the people pleasers; it’s for those of us who have trouble with the word “No,” and can tend to take on too much as a result.

“Am I honouring myself while serving others?”

Very often, we can become people pleasers because of our internal need to give; to take care of – hence the propensity to say “yes.” When we feel naturally inclined to help; we get meaning and purpose from serving others. This is a lovely quality and one that we don’t want to compromise within ourselves as it allows us to derive a purposeful feeling from being able to help another.

Saying no is what creates the dichotomy; when we say no to someone, it creates friction with the part of ourselves that desires to give. And yet, saying yes to everything allows us to forget one very important person – ourselves. 

I rather appreciate the way this question is worded, because it takes into account the position of “I am important and so are you.” It encompasses our need to serve others while at the same time honouring ourselves – by making sure that we are finding balance between self-care and helping others, that we learn the value of slowing down and examining just how much we have piled onto our plate, that we have begun to realize that learning to say no is possible (and healthy!)

This can become a good reminder question when we are feeling overwhelmed, frazzled, weighted. And if the answer is no, we can gently remind ourselves that by honouring ourselves as well as others, we have moved into a healthy and balanced position. Sounds like a good plan to me 🙂

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Photo credit: http://Photo by Andy Willis on Unsplash

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